Glossary:

accumulate - to gather or pile up; amass - accumulation - accumulator.

archival - suggests that a material or product is permanent, durable, or chemically stable, and that it can therefore safely be used for preservation purposes.

archive - 1. often archives public records of historical interest. 2. a place for storing archives. 3. a. a storage are. usu. on magnetic tape, for files not in active use. b. a file containing data compressed for ease of storage or transfer.

autoimmune - of, relating to, or caused by autoantibodies or lymphocytes that attack molecules, cells, or tissues of the organism producing them.

contingency - an event that may occur; possibility.

contingent - 1. liable to occur but not certain; possible. 2. conditional. see syns at dependent. 1. a share or quota, as of troops. 2. a representative group.

diabetes mellitus - literally, honey-sweet diabetes: a variable disorder of carbohydrate metabolism caused by a combination of hereditary and environmental factors and usually characterized by inadequate secretion or utilization of insulin, by excessive urine production, by excessive amounts of sugar in the blood and urine, and by thirst, hunger, and loss of weight. resulting in diabetes, an autoimmune disease.

repetitious - filled esp. with needless repetition.

ritual - 1. the prescribed form of a ceremony. 2. a system of ceremonies or rites. 3. a

ceremonial act or a series of such acts. 4. a customary or regular procedure.

somatic - of the body, esp. as distinguished from a body part, the mind, or the environment; physical.

somatophobia - fear of the body.

time - 1a. a nonspatial continuum in which events occur in apparently irreversible succession, b. an interval separating two points on this continuum; duration. c. a number, as of years, days, or minutes, representing such an interval. d. a similar number representing a specific point on this continuum, reckoned in hours and minutes. e. a system by which such interval are measured or such numbers are reckoned.

vesica piscis - "Vessel of the Fish," a common yonic symbol, the pointed oval, named from the ancients' claim that female genitals smelled like fish. Mother Kali herself appeared in a Hindu story as "a virgin named Fishy Smell, whose real name was Truth," like Egypt's Goddess Maat. Egyptians said Abtu, the Abyss, was "a fish who swallowed the penis of Osiris," but this abyss was also "The Fish of Isis," therefore a sexual metaphor. Aphrodite's principal rites at Paphos took place under the sign of Pisces, the Fish. Aphrodite, Isis, Freya and other forms of the Goddess in sexual aspect appeared veiled in fish nets.

The vesica piscis was an unequivocally genital sign of sheila-na-gig figures of old Irish churches. The squatting naked Goddess displayed her vulva as a vesica, as did the temple-door images of Kali in India. One of the old pagan ideograms of sexual union was adopted by the church to represent the Feast of St. Nicholas on the runic calendar: a vesica piscis enveloping a male furka.

The pointed-oval fish sign was even used by early Christians to represent the mystery of God's union with his mother-bride - which is why Jesus was called "the little Fish" in the Virgin's fountain.

This female enclosure was much used in Christian art, especially as a superimposition on Mary's belly, with her child within. Sometimes Christ at his ascension was shown rising into a heavenly vesica, as if returning to the Mother-symbol. The vesica was also shown as a frame for figures of Jesus, God, and Saints.

Another name for the same sign was mandorla, "almond," which also represented a yoni. In the cult of the Magna Mater, an almond was the feminine conception-charm for the virgin birth of Attis (p. 1045-1046, Barbara G. Walker, The Woman's Encyclopedia of Myths and Secrets, 1983).

zoe - "Life," a Gnostic name of Eve, comparable to the teutonic All-Mother Lif. Zoe was a daughter or emanation of the Gnostic Goddess, Sophia, who gave Adam his soul. She also threw down to the Abyss the unjust Creator, who had dared to curse her, and elevated the Lord of Hosts to the seventh heaven, where she undertook to instruct him about the eighth, the Great Mother's dwelling place. Gnostic Gospels said Zoe's power alone animated the first clay man, after various gods had tried and failed. Therefore the man called her Mother of All Living. The canonical Bible kept her title, but eliminated her giving of life to Adam (p. 1102, Barbara G. Walker, The Woman's Encyclopedia of Myths and Secrets, 1983).

Selected Texts from Artist’s Books:

More Below, for Alice Notley

1999/2000

i do not like what men do

i do not

what women

my head is

bald

my legs are

veined

all my blue is

down below

just shiny and

smooth above

but

i shutter

when i leave

the house

the

walls

i walk with

a tilt

i walk

as if there's

something a

gilt

they gock

at

my big black

leather shoes

as if

my walk

did this

as if i caused

their deformity

i think

It's the shoes

somewhere

in between

forty

65

i move slow

they think

that

i think

methodical

my hands

(big black thick)

they're from

work

but

they

work

but

fear

when i leave the walls

they hold

but

protect

but

then there's them

they have eyes

they look

smooth pink red

baby flesh

my father says

there's something wrong

with a man

like me

living alone

gorilla (handed)

fat fleshy feet

but it's the way

if you go slow

slow enough

you don't forget

things

don't forget

but repeating

repeat

repeating

is what helps

it stay

but

don't want to be

like my father

too close

can't stand myself

like that

for too long

my mother died

i was older

than my brother

he wasn't

doing well

now

better than me

it's my state

at this stage

i don't want to

have to

anything

that's unnecessary

i want to go

without

but he

even he

might yet

convince

can't go on

like this

like he used to

help

help

i don't like help

trying to explain

what is

as if

that would

help

them to

but it doesn't

would rather stay

inside

within my walls

the telephone

hardly bothers

i change its voice

often to

confuse

them they are

nothing i need

my music box

my five favorite books

my bottled water

bread

cardboard

i collect

the one thing

i don't have to pay for

for my money isn't much

to me yet

for them

a constant push

their cars push me

not hit yet

not quite waiting

yet

know it's always there

even where i love

love walking

east

away from land

closer to the lake

water

it cools off

my forehead

only thing

to unblur

my eyeglasses

my eyes

otherwise

it's really unfair

that they

get to see

more

than me

but with my head

bulbing

in & out of

water

cold of lake

reduces the glare

opens retinas' iris

clarifies iridescent

fish

for me

besides my walls

it's the water

i love

but getting from

walls

to

water

i don't

i couldn't

understand

him

when i was

little

brother not born

and when i was

still a help

then he was

born and

father hated leaving

walls coffee books

such an ordeal

even locating

bus fare lots of coins

yes

but

never understand

what went go

after i nudged

him

trying to awake

but then

i

my hands

attached still to

my connected

arms

were allowed to lift push shove

controllably

i pushed shoulder

lift right palm

let drop

time to get up

5 more minutes

but by then

it was too

late

past 10

past noon

supper time

i didn't like

how the days

went

didn't want

waste

yet what

now from walls

to water

my arm still

attaches to

my body

socket

hand still

to my

wrist

but not much

move

a long lump

as if planted

inside

my index pinky thumb

there are

small

barely small

magnets

pulling

for me

what i can't

that of just

unscrewing

from sockets

my formlessness

i've thought of

but there would be

bleeding

can't stand

the thought

but they look

even as i'm

not

at them

i don't care

what they are

like

for

i'm not

that

defined

it's hot today

drooling

loosing

my own

water

from my mouth

not too efficient

my collecting

it all

out at once

like i see

other other

men do

neat efficient

i don't

and miss

sewer

get shoe

she saw

me

from the window

of cafe

instead

when she walks

with me

even her

my mom looks

at them

as if

asking

please don't stare

at him

don't change

your face

when it's

hot

and

his left arm

when it begins

and does

droop as if

the bones

have been

completely

sucked out

but usually

she's at home

doesn't usually

leave

and this in blood

yes

perhaps some

truth

but mine

i make

made

by myself

bring keys

2 dollars

in

right pant pocket

folded in half and

half again and

2 keys to

my walls

when i

set out

to walk

water in head

folded in

right pant

pocket

out

down same street

each day

today too hot

melting

labored

my slow

four blocks

east

down

small dirt worn

track

made

by myself

leaves down

grasses tickle

up

and

even on

rainy days

when i'm wetter

then

water i'm walking to

when they see me and

from car windows

air conditioned

shake their

heads

funny looking

at me

i don't

worry

wonder

where they're

going

i'm

from walls

and i know

i'm here

my filled feet

soft with

growing blood

level

themselves

safely

in the soft sand

one of only

accommodating things

that i have

but not really

for

they could

as well

give up

other other

things

and walk down here

today

a too hot day

i reach tide

and am

very glad

they don't see

me

joying

today i don't

want to do

return trip

am forgetting

walls

even my

walls

am enjoying

too much

the cool of

the water and

don't want to

melt

with them

watching

joying

i remember

my dad

sitting at top of

oakland steps

freshly bathed and

clipped and shaven

and one foot

crossed

propped over

on top

the other

taking fresh socks

and

wiping

lint dust

rug debris

off of

clean foot

for

he said

even the smallest

piece of

something

even

semi-soft

could sit

inside sock

and if all day